Pessimism, Optimism and Positive Reinterpretation – Give It A Thought

Two People Look At The Same Thing And See Something Different:

Two men look through the same window just after a rain storm.  One sees the muddy ground that will hinder his daily chores, while the other sees the sunshine that brings warmth and brightens the day.  The difference in each man’s view is caused by their different belief systems.  Their belief system governs their perceptions and how they choose to believe.  It’s the classic question, “Is the glass half full or half empty?”  It all depends on your perception and the way you think about it.

If you’ve placed second in a contest, would you be proud of that result?  Would you accept the outcome as a learning experience and use it as a motivator to practice more? Would you increase your knowledge and skills and reenter the contest a second time to try and better your previous results?  Or would you become discouraged and find an excuse not to participate again?  It is all in the way you look at your results.  A second place finish can be a motivator and an invitation to work harder or you can look at it as your best effort and accept the results.  But, with this second choice, you would eliminate an opportunity for self growth. Continue reading

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Ego vs. Humility The Eternal Struggle – Give It A Thought

Ego vs. Humility The Eternal Struggle – Give It A Thought

The Situation:

It was just the other day where I attended a seminar on memory loss. We arrived late and there was no parking close to the entrance. I was dropped off at the door with several items while Elaine went to find a parking place. As I struggled to take the items in, a fellow offered to help by placing my stuff on his dolly. His act of kindness was greatly appreciated and I told him so. We shook hands as I introduced myself. He replied that his name was Ron. We rolled into the meeting. I took my items and found seats in the back.

The meeting started by welcoming all the guest and thanking those who volunteered. With everyone’s attention, the host said, “I want to introduce our speaker tonight. He is the author of the book “Memory Loss”. Please welcome Dr. Ronald Devere.”

To my surprise, Ron got up. He gave an excellent presentation and afterwords, he signed his books. He took the time to speak to each individual and made all of us feel appreciated and welcomed.

I’m telling you this story because it represents a very successful person practicing the virtue of Humility.

Let Me Elaborate:

When some people become successful, they have a tendency to allow their egos to get the better of them and then they forget how to be humble. Success can breed arrogance and a high and mighty attitude.

How To Prevent Your Ego From Taking Over:

An ethical and virtuous person practices humility. Once a person starts to find success, they must be on guard to prevent their ego from getting out of hand. Although it is appropriate to bask in the glow of accomplishments and to accept complements from admirers, do not permit these accolades to inflate the ego. To prevent becoming an Egomaniac, a person must practice Humility always.

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Stress And Anxiety In The Emergency Room

Stress In The Emergency Room

Ring! Ring!

It was my cell phone alerting me that someone was calling. I stopped typing and started looking for my phone beneath all the papers that were cluttered about my desk. “This is David” I answered. “Dave can you give me a ride to the emergency room?” my neighbor and close friend asked. “I’ll be right over” I replied.

The Concern:

That phone call was the start of a stress filled journey to the Emergency Room.  Bill (an alias), met me at the door and explained that his blood pressure had spiked high.  His regular Doctor was on vacation and his office had advised him to go to the Emergency Room. “Not a problem” I said.  We then jumped in the car and headed to the hospital.

The First Stress-er:

Bill signed in and we looked for a seat in the crowded waiting room. The available seats were right across from a poor fellow who evidently had taken a fall.  He had labored breathing.  He was slumped and holding his arm as if something was broken.  He looked at us and mumbled “I think I broke my ribs.” I smiled and nodded and he simply looked back down and resumed his labored breathing.

Emotions flooded over me. This fellow was in so much pain and there was so little that I could do. I felt powerless, my anxiety level started to rise, even more so as blood trickled down his leg from the scrape on his knee.

Another Stress-er:

After 30 minutes passed, Bill was seen in the triage room. His blood pressure was still high, but all the other vitals were normal. “ It will be a little while.  The beds in the treatment room are full” the nurse said. “Oh wow more stress!”, I thought. I hope my friend doesn’t have a problem while we wait.  It took about two more hours of waiting before the nurse came out and called Bill’s name. We were escorted back to the ER treatment room. My friend was instructed to put on a gown and lay down on the bed.

Needles!!!

A Doctor came in and asked all the appropriate questions. “I am going to order an EKG and a blood test.  When we get the results I will be back to speak with you.” he said while pulling back the curtain and stepping out. “This is normal stuff” I reassuringly said to Bill.  A minute later the nurse returned.  She hooked up a blood pressure monitor, an EKG machine and started the recordings.  After the EKG, she said, “I’m going to take your blood draw and set up the IV.” She tied off his arm and out came the needle!  Now, I have had blood draws, but I normally look away.  This time I was curious and decided to watch. That was a mistake, even though I was not the one getting stuck with the needle.   Just the sight of it raised my blood pressure and I had to look away.

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Negative Obsessive Thinking and It’s Effect – Give It A Thought

Negative Obsessive Thought and It’s Effects – Give It A Thought

How Does Negative Obsessive Thinking Begin?

Do you ever have genuine concerns about a situation, problem, friend or relative? You can be so concerned that you keep thinking about it. You start going over the history of the situation in your mind. What happened in the past. Who said what. Who did what.

You’re trying to understand each parties intentions and why they acted the way they did. This is all well and good, for it does help to explore situations from all points of view.

The Next Progression:

Before you realize it, you start to think “What If”. What if this happens or what if this is said or what if this occurs. Now your thoughts have progressed into imagination. You are thinking about possibilities and not facts.

What Are The Effects Of Negative Obsessive Thinking?

The effects are many. Especially if the events that you are imagining are not pleasant. Once you are concentrating on “What If’s”, doubt sets in. You become upset, irritable and a whole range of negative emotions rush over you. Your blood pressure will rise, your muscles become tense and you are visibility upset.

What you need to remember, is that these “What If” events are imaginary. They have not happened. They have only occurred in your mind and you have become upset over absolutly Nothing.

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Frustration vs. Persistance – Give It A Thought

Frustration vs. Persistence – Give It A Thought

Getting Frustrated?

Today’s task was to transfer my email list from one provider to another. It sounded simple enough, I mean the instructions were clear and it was easy to get the list from my current provider. I clicked on the drop down and selected export list. Another box appeared, it stated that the list file would be mailed to my email address, all I had to do was click confirm.

The First Issue:

I clicked confirm and went to my mailbox, and sure enough, there was my list of email contacts. Only one little problem, it was sent in Microsoft Excel. I use Open Office, which means it’s not going to open properly. I opened the file with Open Office and sure enough, there was my data and a lot of trash.

A Quick Call to Technical Support:

I knew that this was going to be a problem, so I made a call to technical support. I got connected right away and the help was spot on. We decided that I would have to delete all the junk data and just use what I needed, Email and Full Name. Support even had a sample list  that I could look at and use as a pattern for my data. All I needed to do was download and open it. So, I opened it with Open Office.

The Sample File:

The file was clean of extra characters. It had specific column titles but strangely they were all under column “A”. Email and Full Name in column “A”. It did not take me too long.  I deleted all unnecessary characters and changed the titles to the appropriate heading. I then downloaded this file to the “add members” wizard in the new data base and received an“Error” message.

I Made A Second Quick Call To Technical Support!

I was quickly connected to support and I told them this story. Immediately the tech guy said, “you have to separate the Email address in one column, the Name into another column, convert the file to CSV and then our system will take it. “I understand, what you’re saying makes sense, but your sample file has all the data in column “A” I exclaimed. The tech guy says “let me look at it” and then it dawns on me, “I opened this file with Open Office. I mentioned this to tech support and he said that Open office would open the file differently that Microsoft Excel. We decided that I should use two columns with proper headings and then save as in a CSV format.

I Need A Break!

The first episode of frustration had set in. I realized that I needed to calm down and relax. I did a few minutes of Breathing Exercises and then a session of Progressive Muscle Relaxation. I felt refreshed.  My mind was clear and I was ready to start again.

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Outsourcing Tasks, Give It A Thought

Outsourcing: Let A Professional Do It – Give It A Thought

You Can’t Do It All:

For all my life I have felt that I’m better off doing it myself. Working around my house, minor home repairs and even the technical aspects of my Internet business. With age I have grown wiser and now realize that sometimes, “It’s better to let a professional do it”.

Do I Save Money On The Labor?

When I do a project myself, I save money on the labor charge. I save money there, but it takes me time to do it. Usually, it takes me much longer to complete the same task. A professional, who does this work all the time, is much faster and more efficient. So I ask you, “Am I really saving money in this situation?” I am tied up doing the task, when I could be doing something else that I do well. Chances are, I am not saving money on the labor.

Do I Do Just As Good A Job?

Well now, that is real debatable. I have always prided myself in my work. I always try to do my best. I now realize there are some things that others do much better than myself. As an example, setting up a website.

I have been blogging for four years using wordpress and various themes. I have never been totally satisfied with what I created. After joining the Ultimate Blog Challenge this July, I got to look at several different websites. “Shock and Awe”, these sites are awesome! The “Light Came On“, and I realized what I created couldn’t compete.

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Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality

Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality

Know Who You Are:

Who you are is the product of your thoughts and life experiences. It is the words of your thoughts that create your belief system. Harsh words equals negative thoughts. These hard harsh thoughts create a negative belief system which generates an undesirable reality. If you use positive words in your thoughts, then your beliefs will create a reality of happiness and joy in your life.  You will gradually begin to change.

The Question Is  “How Do You Find Out Who You Are”?

Are you a negative or positive person? Is the glass half empty or half full? Your journey of change needs a starting point. To find that starting point, you must ask yourself “Who am I?”. In order to answer that, you will need to do a Self Introspection examination. Once you have completed this self examination, and have an understanding of who you are, the process of change can begin.

Where Do You Start?

Change starts with the choice of words in your thoughts. We all have negative thoughts. What we need to do, is recognize a negative thought and then rethink it using positive words. By doing so, the thought becomes positive and your attitude, mood and actions turn for the better. This creates a much better perspective from which to view any issue or life in general!

An Example:

Your boss comes up to your desk and says, “Hey, I need you to work this Saturday.” You might think, “It’s not my turn to work Saturday, that’s not fair it’s Bill’s turn.” You recognize that this is a negative thought. It is comes from the negative emotions of hurt and jealousy. Rethink it like this, “Even though it is not my Saturday to work, let me talk with the boss and find out his reasons for working me.” This is a much better way of thinking. It puts a positive spin on the situation. It offers engagement with your manager to help you understand his reasoning. By taking Bill out of the thought, it prevents the emotion of jealousy towards a coworker.

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Calming Down Using Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Progressive Muscle Relaxation For Calming

It’s been a long hard day. I am feeling down and need to work on my self improvement techniques. How in the world can I get ready to do these sessions and get the most out of them, when I am tired, achy and mentally exhausted?  I prepare myself  by performing Breathing Exercises and an abbreviated version of PMR. Once I have completely relaxed myself, my mind and body are ready. Let me explain my version of PMR.

What Is Progressive Muscle Relaxation?

PMR is a technique of alternately tensing and then relaxing individual muscles. PMR was developed by Dr. Edmund Jacobson in the early 1900′s to help with anxiety. Some feel that the process of tightening a muscle and then concentrating on the sensation of the muscle relaxing, can help to reduce stress. For the purpose of calming the mind and physically relaxing the body in preparation for self improvement sessions, a shorter and simpler version is used.

For information on a complete PMR session you may go HERE!

How Is PMR Done?

Progressive Muscle Relaxation is a two step process. It entails a physical component, (the contraction of the muscle) and a mental component (concentration on the sensation of the muscle relaxing)

The Physical Component:

The physical component involves lying down or sitting, closing the eyes then tensing and relaxing muscle groups. These groups include the legs, abdomen, chest, arms and face. You will tense each group for about 10 seconds and then allow these muscles to relax for about 15 to 20 seconds. You will do each muscle group in sequence. For this abbreviated version, do each muscle group only once.

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Relaxation, Breathing Exercises

Breathing Exercises For Relaxation

What Is A Breathing Exercise?

There are many different forms of breathing exercises depending on the discipline performed and the results desired. For my purpose of getting relaxed in preparation to do Affirmations, EFT or Self Introspection, I use the simple form of Belly or Abdominal Breathing.

How Is Belly Breathing Performed?

Belly breathing is done by contracting the diaphragm muscle located between the chest and stomach cavity. When this muscle is contracted, air enters the lungs while the stomach expands. By using the diaphragm, more air is taken into the lungs. This technique exceeds the volume of air inhaled by using the chest muscles during normal breathing. The result is more air in, meaning more oxygen absorption which is therapeutic for the muscles of the body. A simple example would be:

Sit and wear loose clothing (get comfortable)

Put a hand on your stomach (to feel your stomach expand)

Slowly inhale through the nose (this slows down the breath)

Place hand on the stomach  (feel the stomach expand)

Pause for a short moment

Slowly exhale through the nose (this slows down the breath)

Place hand on the stomach (feel the stomach contract)

Repeat five to ten times, this is one set of breaths

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Mindset In Business Success

Your Mindset and The Keys To Business Success

Where Does Success Begin?

Success begins with you and your mindset. The words in your thoughts create the belief system which governs your actions. Thoughts also affect your attitude, by being positive, you are prepared to face the challenges that lay before you. This builds your confidence and willpower with which you solve any issues.

Seek Out Successful Coaches and Friends:

One of the best ways to become successful is to associate with successful people. Find like minded people in your business who have already succeed. Use them as coaches and mentors. Become friends with them and ask their guidance. They are a wealth of knowledge and there is no need to reinvent the wheel. They know what works and what doesn’t work. Their input can save you time and money and both are key to your success.

Do Your Research:

This is so important. First you need to determine that there is an adequate need to fill, service to provide or a problem to solve. Next, find a solution to the problem, need or service. Once you have the solution, then sell it to your prospective customer at a profitable price. I know that this sounds so simplistic, but you better get it right. That is why coaches and mentors are so important. Use them, as well as the services of the Small Business Administration and local Chamber of Commerce. Do your due diligence, know what it is going to take before you invest. Be open minded and willing to learn.

Be Willing To Sacrifice:

You will have to give up time and money. It takes time to become successful. Success is not handed to you, it is earned. There will be many long days and hours dedicated to achieving your goal.

Success in business takes money, a financial investment. You will have to use your own money or borrow. This is why your research is so important. You need to know that your efforts will be able to repay the investment and then pay you a profit.

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